"Temporality is part of the truth" -- Chuck Klosterman

Monday, June 27, 2011

Lovin' the Language Blogfest

This is all Jolene's idea from Been Writing. It's just an excuse to share some work as a writer, but I'm game, even if I don't really understand the point of a blogfest, per se.

The rules are simple. Pick any five lines or any five SHORT exerpts from one of your WIPs. If you're feeling shy, and don't want to share from your own work, share from something you LOVE.

I can do that.

I have a completed manuscript called Trendy Poseurs Go Home, about a high school graduate drifting toward nothing, and if you want to read more about that, you can click the link or the one to the right and visit my author site.

Instead, I will share some lines from my new work in progress that I am currently calling Something About Ghosts and Aliens.

A young boy named Marcus witnesses something extra-ordinary in the woods outside of his grandmother's house, and his older brother, Evan, is never the same. This leads to Marcus's discovery of the Ghost living in the attic of Grandma's house. The rest of the book is his search for more Ghosts, for answers to what happened to his brother. Aliens will show up somewhere. These excerpts are the buildup to Marcus's meetup with the first Ghost:

We weren’t allowed in the room at the top of the turret, but the rest of the house was a continual source of entertainment. Around every corner something new caught up to us. We would creep in and out of cubby holes and crawl spaces. We were explorers and astronauts and pirates and dinosaurs. 

We called it The Forbidden Forest, though it was anything but forbidden. Evan and I would roam out there for hours every day, every summer. Great ferns, rotten logs, rocks and entire trees covered in moss. It was so easy for a child to get lost. 

The universe collapsed around me. Branches snapped. Whole trees shattered. Individual leaves disintegrated with deafening, popping explosions.

I calculated where I thought the sky shimmer had happened and imagined I could still see the spot in the air hovering above the branches reaching up to touch it, to see if it were real. I became the trees, standing tall on the bench, and stretching until my swaying could brush the clouds from the sky. Evan’s snoring became thunder all around me, the anger of the clouds.

I didn’t think I was hearing this, but it was a voice nonetheless. I turned, or willed myself to, but couldn’t feel myself moving. I was floating, alone, except for the Shadow presence, which I couldn’t pinpoint, only intuit.

There you have it. Feel free to encourage me to keep working on it because it's so brilliant and you can't wait to read more. Otherwise, you can go away quietly.

If you're curious, the next couple of blogs on the blogfest list are here and here.


  1. This is brilliant. I can't wait to read more!

  2. That was enough to grab my attention. And once again I am become Oliver twist. Please Sir! I want more!

  3. Wow - you HAVE to keep working on it. So tense and exciting - I'm totally exploring that house with them and playing in the wood.

  4. The combination of all these lines make me very curious! Good luck with this, I enjoyed these.

  5. Yes, please keep working! Now off to my next blog-festie excursion.

  6. I do like this! It makes me think of In the Woods by Tana French (which I loved).

  7. Yep. I am so buying this one when it comes out.

  8. Lovely.

    You had me at the very first one. NICE :D

    Thanks SO MUCH for playing! Looks like a lot of us are excited for this to come out!

  9. @ Wifey: Do I dare doubt the sincerity of this comment?

    @ darev: Thanks. There's more around here somewhere.

    @ Angeline: Thanks for stopping in. And thanks for the "wow."

    @ Shallee: Thanks for coming by. You're not an agent by chance, are you? :)

  10. @ shelly: and thanks for reading.

    @ Michael: Thanks. Is it marketable? Do I show not tell? Have I followed the rules? :)

    @ Jordan: I'll have to check out In the Woods. Thanks.

    @ Charlie: You best start saving now.

    @ Jolene: Thanks for hosting. This was a great idea.

  11. Reads like you're on to something interesting.


  12. I like it. You definitely need to finish it. I'll read it, gladly.

    You've inspired me. Maybe I'll have to post an excerpt from my work sometime soon-ish...

  13. Definitely has the kid-feel and fun of exploring. You can do so much with a big house, woods, and a ghost! Good luck!

    The Write Soil

  14. Yes, please! Keep working on it!

  15. @ Lucy: It's interesting in my head, at least.

    @ Candice: Don't delay! The blogfest ends today! Really, what's keeping you from sharing it right now?

    @ Dawn: Thanks. The rest of the book is supposed to take place after he's grown up, but that doesn't preclude flashbacks and such.

    @ MJ: Thanks for the support. It was your blog that led me to this fest in the first place. Thanks.

  16. Wow - this is great. I can't wait to read more.

  17. The first line dragged my in by my shirt sleeves and the rest never let go. Thank you for sharing.

  18. I love the voice in these and the rhythm of the words. The excerpts all have such good flow, and they totally make me curious about the story!

  19. Loved your excerpts - the tone really changed from the start to the beginning. Great job!

  20. I love anything with kids and ghosts! Thanks for sharing!

  21. I read the whole excerpt.

    And you know my rule. Or you should.

    If you can catch my attention with the first three sentences, I'm probably going to love it. And look at that. I read the whole excerpt.

    So, you know, if you want to finish that would be cool.

  22. @ Jo: I love getting Wows.

    @ Summer: I was reaching for hair, the way my son does, but shirt sleeves will do. :)

    @ Krispy: Thanks for the compliments.

    @ Trisha: It's supposed to go from playful to menacing, or something like that. Is that what you got?

    @ Vicki: I mentioned in an earlier comment that most of the rest of the story is after Marcus grows up, so I hope that doesn't mean you won't still love it.

    @ Chanel: I guess I should get to work. Thanks.

  23. And thanks to all the new people for stopping by today. I hope ya'll return soon, ya hear. I guess I understand the purpose of the blogfest now. :0

  24. Lovin' the memories your excerpt evokes! I feel like a kid again! This is the type of book I loved as a girl. I hope you will continue!

  25. @ Brianna: Thanks. This old house is actually based on my own memory of my grandparents' house in Oregon we used to visit when I was growing up.